Well, what a beautiful smile it is...

i wonder where our smiling faces vanish as soon as we get out of childhood....

we just forget how to smile....

maybe the cruelty of the world is revealed to us which steals our happiness from us..

the smiles of adults can never be this pleasing, this beautiful....as most of the time...

they dont come from deep inside of us.

The human lot as a whole has forgotten how to smile....

If we want to smile as beautifully as this girl does, the smile must come from our inner soul...

and for this...we need to realise that our smiles made our eyes sparkle as a child because we were content...we didnt ask for more and more...just a candy or two made us happy...

And as adults....

we are not even content with millions...in our banks...

if we learn the art of being satisfied with what we have...we can also smile like this.

"As a rule

man is fool

when its hot

he wants it cool

when its cool

he wants it hot

always wanting

what is not".

if we just want what we can have....no doubt we will smile.

SMILE FOREVER, N SMILE FROM WITHIN.

Lets spread smiles...in this world...............

HOPELESSNESS!

"Hopelessness is Pakistan's staple diet and, unlike electricity, flour or sugar, it is here in plenty."

----by Masood Hasan, The News, July,6,08, SUNDAY.



I read the article this sunday and was forced to think about the reality it so boldly expresses.

No doubt, Mr Hasan is right about the grim situation. Pakistan is "plummeting swiflty to oblivion". It was his 100% correct criticism of Mr Aziz (Short-cut Aziz who is happily living abroad now) that made me a regular reader of his columns and here i am being forced to commend him on his great thoughts and writing. I am attracted to his satirical tone, his realistic stating of facts and his concern about Pakistan. I just can't resist the temptation of quoting all his statements in his current article. Any body who missed it, please grab The News' edition for 6 july 08 and read it all till the end. It so poignantly reminds me of thinking about "wiping off our past mistakes as if they were written on a slate using a chalk". But Alas! as Mr Hasan says "those were slates and that was school", we are unable to do so.

This gives us a lesson which is almost too late to learn that we should take every step with extreme caution.This caution never came into the mind of our leaders. And we- the nation- suffer as a result.

I remember the day our frustrated physics teacher kept on speaking about the present scenario with depression in his tone for almost half an hour. He talked about the massive loan we have taken from the world bank and countries like U.S. Making us almost their slaves. He said he became so tense when he thought that every Pakistani has a debt of about 17000RS upon him even those who have the sky as roof and earth as floor. It was a shock for all of us. We had never thought about our country's loans in that terms. 17000RS is not a small amount for thousands who are living below the poverty line. Those who are unable to eat a complete meal even once a day.

A friend of mine asked about what to write about in an essay about Current Problems, even without thinking my mind was flooded with scores of crisis and problems(severe ones) faced by Pakistan.



I hope without any hope that for Pakistan peace, progresss and prosperity will not be forever out of reach. I hope against all hope that one day we will not have hopelessness as our staple diet and sounds of blasts as music for our ears but pleasure,contentment and laughter instead.

HAPPY BIRHTDAY TO ME!!!!!!!!

In between my practicals, exams and preparations (or so-called preparations) for the ET has come this 24th june.
This marks my birthday.
The day i came in this world to make my parents' life a misery ;).
Actually as a kid, i was good enough.
So, i basically disguised my true evil in a mask of innocence so as to fool my parents into deciding to bring me up.
They did bring me up and gave me confidence (a bit more than required).
The result is the present ME.


WHAT SHOULD I DO TODAY?
Celebrate?
Well with the sort of family(the larger unit) i have been blessed, the idea is ridiculous.
I hope one day this whole unit will be as one...and will wish me.
But as of now, i don't want to be wished by a bunch of people who actually don't care.
Who know just hatred, and no love.
Who know just artifice, and no real emotions.
ANYWAYS.........
its a day of happiness...i wont be remembering the painful moments.

Lets just say...thanks to all my friends who have wished me. You are my true family.
THANKS to my MOM who is alway the first one to kiss on my forehead and wish me. Thanks to RA(My childhood buddy) to be always the first one to wish me wherever she is. And thanks to DADDY because i know you pray a lot for me and you love me from your heart. I can see it on your eyes.

Thanks to everyone who ever remembered this poor me.
And wishing a very happy birthday to me............
may i have many many more or may be just a few more.........

The enigma of entry tests......

Its rather a strange state when one is dangling betweem complete freedom and the hectic shedule which is the demand of examinations.And this strange state is what i am going through these days. I am not exactly free from academic pressure (as the entry tests and the practicals are still there to be dealt with) and i am not really bound (because atleast my exams are over).

I really am in a state of complete confusion regarding what to do with the course books which still haunt my dreams.........
I want to get rid of them but i can't. Wondering why????

HUH!!!!!
Not because i am expecting the worst result possible (i.e a failure) but because i will have to go through them again (and again) because of the stupid Entry Test. Now this entry test is also a cute little way of our education system's strategy to keep the students in a state of misery. You work hard, get headaches over the tiring chemistry, stupid physics and lengthy biology but your result is not proof enough of your ability. They will have to cross check it before granting you that letter which will make it possible for you to turn your dreams into a reality. And to top it all...there is not just one test...there are many of them.

The AKU ET..............(which i gave and failed to succeed in)
The NUST-AMC ET..........(which i am trying to prepare for, sheduled to be held on 27th july 08)
The PMC ET............(which will be held in the month of october)

And this is only the list if you are not planning to apply in other private medical colleges.
There is another test which is completely useless, yet compulsory for students desirous to take admission in (quite a number of) other colleges of our country excluding the medical ones...
This is the test taken by NTS (National Testing Service). It is divided into several categories and they just announce their importance when the last date of registration is less than a week(or maybe two) away.
These tests keep us- the miserable student lot- busy the whole year after our final exams. And i have seen quite a lot of the hard working intelligent students dejected due to failure in entry tests. This is a sad sight...to see the dreams of the really bright students shattered just because they were unable to do well in a 2 hour test. The hardwork of many years going into waste just because you were not aware of how difficult it was going to be....
There is a remarkable difference between our way of studying for exams and entry tests. For exams we are supposed to learn everything by heart....(i particularly hate this way of studying). Although our board is repeatedly heard making statements about the change in the pattern resulting in conceptual way of study, the chances of success for those who memorize everything are still far greater.
The entry test preparation is a completely different task. Their the requirement is not only the retention of all the facts learned in past academic years but also their application. You are asked to analyze data on your own and to solve tough problems at a quick pace. It demands a good grasp of basic concepts, a quick mental solving ability and unwavering concentration-a situation most of the students have never faced before.
We- the students- are used to writing( or copying to be fair) every little fact we had read in our books and other notes with the fastest possible writing speed, but when we are asked to answer a question in a single word or sentence, we fail to do so.
This is where the most intelligent of the students fail because they never knew about how to answer precisely.
Now one must be wondering what is the solution to this serious problem???






Well i am just a student myself, do you people really think i know the solution?
If i had, i would not have been ranting about the severity of the problem. :D

Anyways, many academies are publishing numerous adds about how they will make students perform well in the entry test. I wonder how they are going to change the approach of a student to studies in just one or two months.....
They tell us about how many students of theirs have entered prestigious universities and colleges due to their excellent teaching strategies. However, we never see them telling us the number of those students who were unable to enter the desired college despite studying in their academy. I hope they offer atleast something good...because most of the students rely on the preparation their courses offer. But i would like to say that whether you join an academy or not..you must try your best, work hard and practice. Practice as many questions as you can. Practice, practice and practice. It is the key to your success. Learn from your mistakes....consult good quality books and widen your scope of learning. In the end, no matter what the outcome is, you know you have tried your best. And this feeling is what is the most important.....

papers leaked out.....

So, papers are really eating my time...
i feel like whether i prepare or not...the result is pretty much the same.....(hahaha)
Anyways i am in no mood to discuss my exams over here...

I am in mood to discuss the exams of my juniors......i.e the poor lot of SSC(Matric) I heard that the physics paper leaked out twice.....and the third time it leaked out...the poor frustrated federal board just took the exam anyway...Maybe they were tired of remaking the paper again and again or it could be that our crisis hit country had been on the verge of a paper crisis if a new paper was printed on such a large scale.
Whatever the reason, still the poor SSC lot is screaming about the paper being out of course...(it could be that those unfortunate ones who were unable to reach the leaked out paper are indirectly complaining about there "misfortune").
As per the routine, an Inquiry committee has been ordered to analyse if the complain(of paper being out of course) is justified or not. As usual the committee would submit its report in God knows how much time and then...according to the report if necessary the students will be compensated by Grace marks...

I want to ask a question from our respected board members....if they always are forced to award students with grace marks, why do they make such a paper in the first place?
Our education system is the most unstable of all the world i believe...
it keeps on oscillating between the composite/divided exams.......the open/restricted choice and many more...
The life of students is a constant misery just because of this instability.
It is a huge uncertainty that according to which system and which pattern will they have there exams. In such situations, the board not only turns a students life into a miserable one.. it also plays with the careers of many students. We all know that matric and fsc are of prime importance in any one's career especially if someone is pursuing the professional education of medicine or engineering.
Such unstable system results in poor performance by many capable students and as a result they fail to enter the professional institutions which ask for a high score in both fsc and matric.

The board should try to establish a stable, secure system to accurately judge the abilities of a student. This is only possible if an excellent education policy is formulated and implemented....
Whatever the finalized system is...it should be for a long term and should not change on yearly basis.

For the new students, I would like to say.....
I know how it feels when you get lower grades than you are capable of just because you were unable to adjust with a new system that keeps on changing. But still, believe in your self and your capabilities. Work very hard, and concentrate on the concepts you are being taught. Hard work never goes unrewarded....and even with an unstable system if you do your best... you will InshaAllah have a good outcome.
For the ones who are suffering right now...
Dear ones, i am with you to share your misery...just relax and try to give your best. Leave the rest to the Almighty. And pray a lot for a stable education system in our beloved country PAKISTAN.

date sheet announced!!!

hmmmmmmmmm

news of the day is???

"the date sheet for the finals has been announced...."
as usual it is quite stupid ....to be a typical Paki student "quite bongy"

as always all the subjects which require more time to prepare have no reasonable gap and the ones we call as....."compulsory" and never pay attention to have......around 4-6 days...

the month of may and half of june is completely dedicated to the exams.....
so this means
minimum net usage, maximum brain usage ( if you have any)
and more than maximum hand usage as you have to write loads.....


Anyways even after that no relief awaits the poor fsc students....
as the ghosts of entry tests are ready to make our mind go wild......

just wishing myself goodluck ;)
and hoping that all my fellow mates will do good....

The misery of missing......

This post is for all those people i cant stop missing, no matter how hard I try.

Well, in our life we come across a lot of people.....
some of them bring fun in our life and some of them are just there to irritate the hell out of us.
The people who are responsible for bringing trouble in our life whether intentionally or not are many. But the ones who hurt us the most (or atleast me) are those who come in our life for a few days or months and give us a lot of happiness but than suddenly without any apparent reason go out of it. A few days back i recieved an email that suggested that we should not carry the bitter moments of past with us...
it was a story of two chinese monks which i will share some other time...
The point is even if we do forget the bitter moments of the past, should we remember the good ones??
What kind of approach should we have when the most happiest moments of our past when remembered turn into a misery.

This is what happens when someone who was the cause of happiness for you suddenly is no more there. Death is a fact and so when our dear ones leave us, with the passage of time we accept that they are not any more in this world but just in our hearts.
They dont leave us on their will.
However their are some people (those who maybe are not aware that they are dear to someone) who without giving you any reason just end the relation you enjoyed for a long time.
There are many ways of telling someone that you are no more wanted.
Among these is the tactic of ignorance.
This means that ignore the person you dont want anymore around you and indirectly give him the message "go to hell".
Another is of arguing uselessly to irritate the other person so much that he starts hating you and the time you spend together.

Maybe i am an abnormally sensitive person who imagines every thing is going the wrong way.
But still this is the message some people are giving. I therefore do take some rash steps to avoid the mounting tension such poeple give me by just ending the relation myself. This is what i did this time. But the guilt and uneasiness i am feeling from the moment i took the decision without even saying bye is not a relief. SO, here i am blogging again...
just in case a friend accidently views this page, he would be able to understand my behaviour.

A message to a friend:
"Dear F!
The time we had was sure fun. I dont know what changed your behaviour but i do know that i tried and did ask for a reason. You never accepted that anything had ever gone wrong and i cant say it right when its not. So, whatever you may think about me...
i did what i thought was best i.e i really thought after such bitter talks as we used to have lately. there is no point in spoiling what good memories we had with increasing the bad ones.
i am sorry if i did anything that had hurt you. But it sure did hurt when i felt i no longer exist in your life as a friend. Please forgive me if i were wrong."




No matter how hard i try, i can never forget people who i considered at any point of my life as my friends. And when the friendship is no longer there...
it hurts a lot more....
i miss all those who are no more around me....whether intentionally or not.........