We can't change it!!!!!

"Oh!!!!!
What a cute baby.....such a janu.....
see her....Oh how sweet?"

Everyone was so excited to see such a cute kid around.....

"Oh check her chubby cheeks yar......"

The girl.....was with her father and was waving back to some girls....with a very sweet, cute smile on her face...

"I think she has some _______", someone said.

"Oh! no yar.....this is not possible...look how sweet she is."
"yeah, she looks so pyari masha'Allah say......and perfectly fine...."

"No, yar there is some problem....." , another insisted.

While this discussion was going on.....the girl was out of sight....
She looked to be about 2 years and some months old.....
was very very cute, and quite active......

After a few moments, she again came in sight.....and was in everyone's notice again.....
This time she came and sat on the stairs and her mom (who was accompanying her this time) told her name as 'Malaika'....

FI brought her upstairs and unlike other kids who would cry and run away frightened....she came happily and sat with us...

"What's her age?" someone asked.
Her mom replied, "3 years".

On getting a close look, our fears seemed quite right.

She had it....she had speech problems, her eyes were not quite normal (although they were of a very beautiful colour), her smile was great, nidz even said she had that " single transverse palmar crease".... we tried to check but could not notice because her mom was ready to take her home now.

It seemed so unfair....
Her reflexes were sharp.... she was such a pretty kid..
She was here in the hospital because her father had some injury on his leg...which she sweetly told us by pointing on her own leg....

BUT SHE HAD DOWN'S SYNDROME.......

She was not interested in leaving so much of attention...and so we went with her for a little distance......
We disappeared....
But encountered her again after some while...
she kissed all of us.....
said bye in a scream...and left after waving her hand for quite long.......

She left us thinking for a while....

"How could it be yar....."
"such a pretty kid....."

But then, as Nidz said....
"We can't change it yaar"

It seems unfair, buts thats how it is.....
The harsh reality of life.....

Hospitals are a strange place...
They give hope to many people....cure to others....
and have no idea what to give to some people...
Malaika is probably one of them....

We can't help her much because its a genetic problem....
But yes family support probably would do her some good....
she is such an active, responsive, lovely, happy, cute kid....
i hope this society doesn't give her any complexes by offering too much of pity....

I pray for a miracle to make her as perfect as she could be....
and yes for her to stay happy....forever

MAY ALMIGHTY ALLAH BLESS HER!!!

"Indeed! such a cute, lovely, janu, pyara bacha. Muuaah!!!"

New year 2009!!

So, this is going to be my first post of 2009.
I hope this year will prove to be a far better one than the last one....

I never make resolutions. Because i know i won't be able to keep them.
I just hope i will be a better human than i was at 31st december last year when this date comes again in 2009.

Wishing everyone and myself a very happy new year!!!

The sun will still rise!!

His time was quickly running out. He had to reach the seaside before dawn. He increased his pace and then decided to run to get there in time. He had always been fascinated by dawn, by the rising sun, by the first ray of sunlight. The ray which wipes away all darkness and which symbolizes hope. Despite all his attraction for dawn and sunrise, he had never been so regular in coming here. But two weeks back, everything had changed.

Two weeks back, he had realised that his life had betrayed him. And now, he wanted to or rather hoped to see all kinds of dawns that he would have seen if his life had not done this to him. He had always been the optimistic type, seeing all the bright sides of life.
But now, it was different.
This time, he himself was the victim.
Victim of betrayal...........

He was there now. Watching the waves splashing the beach. It was dark like his future prospects.
And then, the sun appeared on the horizon, wiping away all the darkness from the surroundings. But inside him, it was still pitch black.
No hope, no light, no dawn!!!

All his life, it had been drilled in his mind that life is very uncertain. That man is never sure even of his very next breath. And he hated words like unsure, uncertainty etc.

But now.....

Now he thought 'uncertainty' was a blessing. He knew what a curse it was to be sure when your life is going to end, to be able to count your remaining breaths, remaining days, remaining weeks or even years. But he knew that no years were left for him. Only six months.....
Or 24 weeks or 168 days....
Ahhh! even if he said 4032 hours....
That was not enough.
His plans were for a much longer life. For him, his life has just started.
His dream flight had just taken off and...
And some jerk in a white coat had given him a piece of paper telling him there was no fuel left for the journey.
He was no smoker, no drug addict. He had always taken good care of himself. But the GOOD LORD had somehow found a fault with him.........
So, his time was running out.

The sun was dominating now. The day was bright and sunny. He decided to go back home.

Home..........
Where all the important people of his life lived. His mom, dad, sisters, brother. People who were discussing his forth-coming marriage - two months later.
So far, he had been unable to muster enough courage to tell them the truth. The bitter truth that he was not going to marry afterall.
Because.....

Yes, because he was going to die after six months.
After 25 years of struggle, academic achievements, medals, certificates and finally a good job. His fate has chosen an early death for him.
He was at home and faked a smile for everyone else.

Sitting in his room, the scenes from dawn were still mocking him infront of his eyes. He thought he was fooling himself by going and watching all those sunrises everyday. He decided, he will see the sunset today for a change.
ATLEAST it was more like his life. Hopeless....promising nothing other than darkness.

He picked up the newspaper from the table thinking it might distract him from the present thoughts.
It was an old newspaper- some three weeks old. He already knew all the contents by heart. He had been blessed with a sharp memory.

Huh!!! it was of no use to him now.
Six months.......Phew!!!!!!! All will be over.

He read that already read article once again. He had not given much notice to it then. But this time, his thoughts were running wild.
It took just a split second for him to decide. He got up and went out. His destination was not too far from his home so he decided to go there on foot.
He was smiling because he had a purpose this time. After some 20 minutes, he was in the doctor's office. He told him what he had in his mind. The doctor was pleased and applauded his decision. He brought a form out from the drawer.
Azaan took some time filling it. He thanked the doctor and came back home.

He smiled and said Salam loudly to greet all his family. This time his smile brightened his eyes too.
In the evening, he told his brother first about his diagnosis of terminal cancer and then about the decision he had taken today.
His brother was shocked at first but slowly it all sinked in. He hugged Azaan tightly with tears shining in his eyes.





Five months passed in no time. He never missed a single dawn. The pain was unbearable for him now. He could barely walk. His brother always accompanied him now. He had spent the five months trying to see all he could have seen if he had some 30 or 40 years more to live.

The sun was rising and the waves were splashing. He was standing there waiting to greet the angels. He knew they were coming. But he was not hopeless......

Because he knew even when he would not be here physically, his eyes will still see the sun rise. His death will colour up the world for someone else.
He had always wanted to make a difference in the society, in people's life. He considered the mission accomplished now.

He knew the sun will still rise and brighten up the world. The dawn would still symbolize hope. His eyes may close, but not forever.
Yes, the sun will still rise and symbolize hope. He knew hope was eternal.


(Azaan had decided to donate his eyes to the blind to make a huge difference in someone's life. He died but made someone's else life worth living. A part of him will always live).

PS: I know the idea is a much talked-of one....but i wanted to write it because of some articles i read which really touched me. As a medical student the first thing our facilitators tried to make us realise was that death is the most difficult thing to deal with. What i feel makes us fear death is the realisation that as we will cease to exist in this world physically, our importance would be lost. We-as humans- want to feel important. We like to think that we are making a difference in people's life.
The biggest satisfaction can come in our life when we find out the real purpose of our being here in this world
The knowledge that even if we don't exist physically in the world, our spirit will be here and our deeds would make an everlasting difference in someone's life is indeed a boaster for the spirit.

"BADAN KI KHAK AKNHON KA PANI CHOR JAUNGA

MAI DARYA HUN BAHAO MAI RAWANI CHOR JAUNGA

MUJHE MALOOM HAI AKHIR TERI DUNIA SAY

CHAL JAUNGA PER APNI KAHANI CHOR JAUNGA

MAI KHUD KO MUNTAQIL KARDUNGA APNI ANEY WALI NASLON MAI

MAIN APNI APNEY BACHON MAI JAWANI CHOR JAUNGA"