As a rule, man is fool; when its hot, he wants it cool; when its cool, he wants it hot; always wanting what is not!

Sunday, March 16, 2008

The misery of missing......

This post is for all those people i cant stop missing, no matter how hard I try.

Well, in our life we come across a lot of people.....
some of them bring fun in our life and some of them are just there to irritate the hell out of us.
The people who are responsible for bringing trouble in our life whether intentionally or not are many. But the ones who hurt us the most (or atleast me) are those who come in our life for a few days or months and give us a lot of happiness but than suddenly without any apparent reason go out of it. A few days back i recieved an email that suggested that we should not carry the bitter moments of past with us...
it was a story of two chinese monks which i will share some other time...
The point is even if we do forget the bitter moments of the past, should we remember the good ones??
What kind of approach should we have when the most happiest moments of our past when remembered turn into a misery.

This is what happens when someone who was the cause of happiness for you suddenly is no more there. Death is a fact and so when our dear ones leave us, with the passage of time we accept that they are not any more in this world but just in our hearts.
They dont leave us on their will.
However their are some people (those who maybe are not aware that they are dear to someone) who without giving you any reason just end the relation you enjoyed for a long time.
There are many ways of telling someone that you are no more wanted.
Among these is the tactic of ignorance.
This means that ignore the person you dont want anymore around you and indirectly give him the message "go to hell".
Another is of arguing uselessly to irritate the other person so much that he starts hating you and the time you spend together.

Maybe i am an abnormally sensitive person who imagines every thing is going the wrong way.
But still this is the message some people are giving. I therefore do take some rash steps to avoid the mounting tension such poeple give me by just ending the relation myself. This is what i did this time. But the guilt and uneasiness i am feeling from the moment i took the decision without even saying bye is not a relief. SO, here i am blogging again...
just in case a friend accidently views this page, he would be able to understand my behaviour.

A message to a friend:
"Dear F!
The time we had was sure fun. I dont know what changed your behaviour but i do know that i tried and did ask for a reason. You never accepted that anything had ever gone wrong and i cant say it right when its not. So, whatever you may think about me...
i did what i thought was best i.e i really thought after such bitter talks as we used to have lately. there is no point in spoiling what good memories we had with increasing the bad ones.
i am sorry if i did anything that had hurt you. But it sure did hurt when i felt i no longer exist in your life as a friend. Please forgive me if i were wrong."




No matter how hard i try, i can never forget people who i considered at any point of my life as my friends. And when the friendship is no longer there...
it hurts a lot more....
i miss all those who are no more around me....whether intentionally or not.........